Use your words to paint a picture to explain what happened. Using a narrative makes your essay more interesting and keeps the reader engaged!
This essay uses a narrative -the student's voice truly shines through!
Two sets of small hands rest on the brick retaining wall, poised and ready for our ballet class. Ideally, we’d be in a studio with flooring and a real barre, but today, the driveway is our studio. Eager to learn, the girls stand in first position waiting to hear what we’ll be doing. I check my notes to see “pliés” with a combination of steps written below. This is all very new to me. I’ve only ever been the one awaiting instructions, but as I stand in the driveway, it’s my turn to lead the class. I’m nervous that I’ll mess up or teach something wrong, but when I look back at the expectant faces of my five- and six-year-old neighbors, I really want this to work.
I started dancing when I was three. My parents signed me up, but I stuck with it because attending the Nutcracker every Christmas with my grandmother was such a special experience. The dresses. The music. The twirling. I loved it all. I got serious when I switched to the Friday class in sixth grade. These were the higher-level dancers, all older than me and more advanced in technical skill, and the teacher challenged us with complex combinations. We studied the difficult move thrown into the already super-fast and precise steps. Determined and committed, the group of us came together as collaborators and became friends. The challenge was thrilling. That’s why I grew dedicated to these girls on the driveway, wanting them to experience this same feeling of excitement when faced with challenges, but trust in having people to collaborate with.
I started babysitting on Saturdays, on Friday nights I began to ponder what kinds of activities I would do with the kids. Inspired by when I was younger and I spent playing outside with the neighborhood kids, I wanted to recreate this for the younger neighborhood kids during COVID but still wasn’t sure what activity we could do. That’s when I came up with ballet.
Back on the driveway, I look back at my lesson plan. We couldn’t use proper shoes and had very untraditional equipment to work with. Ironically, what developed from teaching a traditional and strict form of dance was a creative solution that was not the typical “ballet norm.”
I know it’ll be okay because my own dance class had to improvise. When our studio shut down during COVID, we found other places to dance. First, a basketball court, then later a parking lot became our studio. On the day of our class performance, we banded together, bringing our parents and friends to a parking lot to see us wreck our canvas shoes on the concrete. It was a little chaotic, but it was beautiful. Now I know that I can dance anywhere. In dance, flexibility is key. Yes, it helps to be physically flexible, but now I know that I can adapt and dance anywhere so long as I surround myself with a supportive community.
I created that same kind of community in my neighborhood too. My weekly dance classes brought me closer to my neighbors and their parents as I saw them more often, and people recognized us from our hours spent outside. While the poised young girls in the driveway performance will always be remembered as my first students, I know they won’t be my last. As I continue to further explore old passions and follow new pursuits, my creativity will only help as I teach and help others. Even in difficult and messy situations, I will use creative problem-solving to find inclusive and thoughtful solutions. My future will hold many challenges, but with the commitment, stamina, and flexibility I have learned from dance, I am excited and ready to face whatever comes my way.
Notice how this student doesn't just tell what happened, she wrote it as if she was telling a story. There are lots of descriptive details that bring the story alive. Consider this as you continue to the next step!
Next Steps: Continue to Step 5-2.